Lingerie is highly eroticized in media. Films and television programmes often show women stripped down to their knickers and bras in steamy scenes that are often all young men in their adolescence have access to, and the erotic images of women undressing become firmly associated in men’s minds with the lingerie itself. The thin fabric, the last bit of clothing concealing her from the viewer’s gaze, becomes an erotic object itself because of the feelings of arousal, fascination and frustration it causes. This association is often impossible to separate as men get older, and the lingerie and knickers themselves are as desirable as the women who wear them.

The women who wear knickers and send them to men get as much pleasure as the men receiving the knickers do. While they are wearing them, the women think about the men who are to receive the knickers, choosing knickers that the men find desirable and pleasuring themselves while wearing them. Although these transactions usually occur over the Internet, there is a deeply personal aspect to it that excites women, many of whom become aroused at the idea of a complete stranger receiving her used knickers and gaining sexual satisfaction from them.

In a way, this fetish has an aspect of exhibitionism for the women who send their used knickers to men. These women lead entirely normal lives while wearing the knickers they are going to send to men, keeping it a secret from most of the people who know them. They send their most intimate garments to men who cannot get enough of them, but who will usually never see them in person or even in any photos that the woman does not choose to send to them. The power dynamics that women experience in their daily lives are completely reversed, giving them all of the control over what the men see and what they receive.

Why used knickers in particular when there is so much pornography on the Internet for free? Many men are not aroused by images on a screen because it is so impersonal. Watching pornography does not feel like sex. Pornography cannot replicate the scents of women and the feelings and arousal they invoke. Used knickers, as women’s most intimate clothing, capture these scents. The knowledge that they were worn by real women, often women whom the men have had some communication with, is much more arousing to men than the detached and almost clinical camera angles in modern pornography. Men who enjoy used knickers are more attracted to the images they form in their imaginations.

When men buy used knickers from women, they are buying much more than the knickers themselves. Women who sell them post pictures and communicate with the men through messages and webcam feeds. Some women who have regular customers even take requests on the colours and types of knickers they send and provide photos of themselves wearing them. Others may engage in domination and submission dynamics with the men who contact them, often while wearing the very knickers that they will eventually send. This allows the men to relive the memories each time they see the knickers sent to them. The idea of a woman ready and willing to do whatever she is asked or even told to do is very exciting to most men, and to receive a memento of an experience is even more arousing.

What makes used knickers so appealing and desirable varies from man to man. Many enjoy the knowledge that they have part of a woman’s life that is so intensely private that only a select few people ever see it. Others enjoy the scents and feeling of the knickers themselves, fantasizing about different colours and fabrics. Some men like certain types of knickers exclusively, such as thongs or lace, while others have no specific preference as long as they have been worn. Most men get pleasure from each of these aspects of the used knickers they receive.

The deeply personal nature of their interactions with the women who send them the knickers is usually a major part of the used knickers fetish, since there is nothing stopping men from buying knickers on their own. Many men who buy used knickers do not have much interest in knickers that are new and unused. Although they are pleasant to look at, they are not as exciting as used knickers.

The used knickers fetish seems strange to many people who are not interested in it themselves, but to the men who do enjoy used knickers, it is a core part of their sexuality and desire. Fetishes do not usually occur from a conscious choice, so embracing them is often all that fetishists can do. Most men do not feel trapped or ashamed of their fetish, but revel in the taboo and secrecy surrounding the knickers and their interactions with the women they receive them from.